Mission Trip in the middle of a Semester, Am I Crazy?

"Are you crazy?"  Yes, I am crazy. I have never argued the depth of my insanity.  After all, I spend unnatural lengths of time studying greek participles, IBS structures, while trying to wrap my feeble brain around much of my lighter weekly reading (usually 200-400 pages) on the subject of the Atonement. I'm a seminary student.  That's how we roll. We are a crazy bunch of people. Seminary students, everywhere, do I hear a "heck yeah"?

So, is it so crazy that I managed to squeeze in an eight day mission trip to Panama in the middle of the semester? I didn't think it was crazy almost a year ago when the plans were set in motion; in fact, I was stoked!  I am traveling with a dear friend, who has a long, amazing family history of missionary work in Panama and Cuba.  It is a privilege to be joining her on this great adventure.  There will be preaching.  There will be teenagers (yes!).  There will be seminary students (yes!!!).  BONUS: We're going to camp on the top of a mountain! Ok, the only way to get up the mountain--climb. So, there will be climbing of large mountains too.

Most importantly however, there will be God, waiting for us to join Him in His work in Panama.  For that is why we go, right?  I mean, there are bigger things than just me, leaving my family, my pile of books and homework assignments, to go on a mission trip.  God is doing something, and I get the privilege of participating.  Yes, the pile of books (200-400pps of reading X 2) and projects/papers (X 4)will be waiting, and will have multiplied, upon my return. That will indeed be painful and challenging.

But in the bigger picture, I am doing the better thing in going to join my Lord in His Work. This reminds me of the story of Martha and Mary in Luke's gospel:

She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said. ⁴⁰ But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, “Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!”

   ⁴¹ “Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, ⁴² but few things are needed—or indeed only one.^[f] Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.

 Sometimes I'm  Martha, scurrying around like a chicken with my head cut off, trying feverishly to get it all done that needs done.  After all, Martha had guests coming! I have professors who demand the work be turned in, on time.  This work must get done. And it must be done with excellence!   That is Martha's heart, right?  She really just wanted to do something great for Jesus, but she got lost in the details for the Master, rather than simply being with the Master.  Seminary is important--it is a great privilege to be participating in this great ministerial equipping that is seminary.  These things too will be used to build God's Kingdom. But can the "doing" trump being at Jesus' feet? Mary had it right then, and I think it must have caught Martha off-guard.  The Text doesn't tell us the rest of the story, does it?  What is Martha do? Did she stop and join her sister? Did she get mad for not being recognized for her efforts to have a great party for Jesus? Or was she a little embarrassed that she had missed the greater opportunity to be in the Master's presence?

We do things sometimes for the wrong reasons.  We all want to do great things for God; indeed, we are called to that as ministers of the gospel message of Christ.  Nevertheless, we must never divorce the "doing" from the "being".  We are in Christ first, loving Him, worshiping Him, so that we can go out and be His Hands and Feet in the world.  The papers, the greek participles, the IBS structures, will all be there when I return, but the seeds that are planted in Jesus name while I am in Panama are eternal.  Those seeds will someday manifest something that is far beyond my degree plan or my credentials as a minister.  That something is divine and holy, and wholly God's.

Call me crazy, if you wish. I'm going to join my Master in His Work.  The other stuff can wait, for a little while. Call me crazy.

Extraordinary God in the most Ordinary Place

I saw God yesterday, in the most ordinary place.  As I reclined in a chair, underneath a bright light, my mouth agape, I saw God yesterday at the dentist office. 

The conversation started with the nominal, surface question, "How are you today?" I replied with the obligatory, "Good, and you?". 

The dental technician was preparing the room for my examination.  Then she said, "I have to go to a funeral this weekend, and I'm not looking forward to it."  She continued to share in a real, vulnerable way that she disliked death. There was something about death that annoyed her, particularly those who were overemotional.  In her eyes, she felt like the people were in a better place, so why was everyone so sad?  I nodded, understanding her thoughts towards death. 

I could sense the Holy Spirit telling me to "listen--don't say much--just listen."  So I just listened, nodding an affirmation here and there, and maybe sharing some words of encouragement. Mostly I just listened.  She transistioned, as to perhaps leave the umcomfortable subject of death, to the relationship with her mother.  (At that point, warning bells began to sound in my ears and red lights flashed in my eyes, I knew God was doing something here)  She had not spoken to her mother for 2.5 years. And next week, her mother was coming to visit.

Reflections of the relationship with my mother over the past fifteen years began surfacing, and as I listened to this dear woman share her heart about her mother, the struggles they have had, and continue to have,  I could heard God gently, so full of Grace, and mercifully reminding me of a promise I had made to Him, and others.  In a matter of minutes, the woman and I had so much in common as we came to a point of similar reference in the middle of a dentist examination room--a most ordinary thing.  In those moments, we received something powerful and Holy--understanding and comfort, reassurance that we are not alone in our pain and loneliness. 

She was afraid of the visit with her mother;  I have been afraid to simply talk to my mother on the phone.
She was worried about her husband; as I have worried about my husband's opinion of my own mother.
She was concerned about her kids feelings; as I have also witnessed my kid's hearts harden, simply disenchanted by a grandmother they hardly know. 

So much she said resounded in my soul.  I could still sense the Holy Spirit asking me to simply listen--not share, as I and most people of God would be inclined to do, right?  (Perhaps my story could help her in this!).  I just listened and told her that I knew where she was, that I also struggled with my own relationship with my Mother and that I would pray for her.

The examination continued as the Dr. came into fill my cavity--and I watched, with my mouth agape, the sound of drilling and tools probing my mouth, God enter into that small space between the Dentist and the Technician, as they talked about how they probably weren't as aware of God as they should be. And I wanted to say, "You are more aware than you realize!" 

The procedure ended. The cavity was filled.  But my heart was wide open, my spirit alive in a new awareness of God's grace and mercy. 

I knew what I needed to do. I told the technician, for sadly I do not know her name, that I would pray for her (later I would be annoyed at myself for not knowing her name but God does).  I prayed as I drove home,  as I dialed my mother's number.  I left a message.  She called back. It was good to hear her voice.  It was good to talk to her. It was good to re-connect with the woman who shaped me and raised me and loved me.  It was good. I told her at the end that I enjoyed our talk, and that we should talk more. 

And maybe, just maybe, the dental technician's Mom will visit next week, and it also will be good, very good.  I want to see her again, if only to ask, "How did it go?" 

I understood more than she may ever realize the depth of her struggle, but God was making it crystal clear to me, in the most ordinary place and in the most ordinary way, that it was time to move forward, even if its scary.All of this happened in the most ordinary place for the most ordinary reason--I had a cavity and it needed to be filled.  Perhaps, Romans 8:28 could fit here, ironically? :) Even God can use an icky thing like a cavity to reveal His amazing Grace and Love!

I saw God yesterday in the most ordinary place.  Where have you seen God? 

It is only rarely on the mountaintop moments of life--though when they come, they are magnificent.  It is most often in the day-to-day stuff of living where He makes Himself known to us.  When we see Him there, we will be made suddenly aware of His Magnificent Grace and Love, as He meets us there in the ordinary places of life.

This devotion from Utmost from His Highest for today, I think, speaks to this quite well.  Peace,  my friends. In Christ.

"The angel in this passage did not give Elijah a vision, or explain the Scriptures to him, or do anything remarkable. He simply told Elijah to do a very ordinary thing, that is, to get up and eat. If we were never depressed, we would not be alive—only material things don’t suffer depression. If human beings were not capable of depression, we would have no capacity for happiness and exaltation. There are things in life that are designed to depress us; for example, things that are associated with death. Whenever you examine yourself, always take into account your capacity for depression.

When the Spirit of God comes to us, He does not give us glorious visions, but He tells us to do the most ordinary things imaginable. Depression tends to turn us away from the everyday things of God’s creation. But whenever God steps in, His inspiration is to do the most natural, simple things-things we would never have imagined God was in, but as we do them we find Him there. The inspiration that comes to us in this way is an initiative against depression. But we must take the first step and do it in the inspiration of God. If, however, we do something simply to overcome our depression, we will only deepen it. But when the Spirit of God leads us instinctively to do something, the moment we do it the depression is gone. As soon as we arise and obey, we enter a higher plane of life."